“My Lord Akoroth?”
“Yes, what is it record keeper?”
“I shall assume that things went badly with the White Lady”
“How dare you presume such things? You insult your lord!”
“Well there were the unmistakable signs…”
“What signs?”
“When the lamp bearer enquired if you wished the lamps turned on you said – No need, the burning bridges are illuminating enough and keeping me sizzling in the bargain…”
“That is no sign of anything heathen. I was being metaphorical”
“When the Zanar ambassador came around and declared that the love between our two thrones would last a lifetime you muttered, quite audibly – Don’t talk to me about love you dim optimistic ape swine”
“They have declared war on us again you fool, so I was merely being prescient”
“International relations might just prove to be your hitherto unseen forte my lord, but I still think you should cease official ceremonies at least”
“Why?”
“Well you signed this birthday card – In my solitary prison of blood and bone, with an empty throne and hall of stone, I rule as Lord all alone. Happy fucking birthday”
“There is no rule that you have to write best wishes!”
“What about the naming ceremony, my lord?”
“What about it?”
“Well the parents had asked you to name the child. A female child sir…if you recall”
“Is there a point here?”
“well, you named her – 4th Baron of Bhama, Her Lady Don’t-grow-up-and-break-an-innocent-Lord’s-heart-you-bitch”
“Errr.. A fine name? Descriptive? No?”
“My lord. Really?”
“Sigh..Fine fine…close the court for a week”
“a wise decision my Lord”
